By Lydia Sterry | Submitted 2023
We’ve all been there; you have someone in your life that you care about and you feel they would truly benefit from participating in therapy.
Do you believe someone in your life could benefit from therapy, but they seem hesitant to give it a try?
What are some of the ways you might encourage them to go?
What could you do that might make a difference and doesn't involve being intrusive?
Before we get into this, we chould consider what actions to avoid.
We might want to avoid ultimatums such as saying, “You need to go to therapy or else”.
That usually doesn’t work well.
Or they might go but not be really engage in the therapy.
We might want to remember how we can’t force a person to go to therapy, but we could try to encourage them in a supportive manner.
What might this sensitive and delicate process of encouragement look like?
~CHOOSING THE RIGHT TIME AND PLACE:
Find a quiet and comfortable setting where you can have a private conversation without distractions.
Ensure the person is calm and receptive to discussions.
~EXPRESSING YOUR CONCERN:
Begin by expressing your genuine concern for the person's well-being. Let them know that you've noticed they've been going through a tough time or seem to be struggling with certain issues. Be empathetic and avoid judgment.
~LISTENING ACTIVELY:
Give the person an opportunity to express their thoughts and feelings without interruption. Show that you genuinely care and validate their experiences. Let them know you're there to support them.
~SHARING YOUR OBSERVATIONS:
In a compassionate and non-confrontational manner, describe specific behaviours or patterns you've noticed that may indicate the benefits of therapy. For example, you can mention changes in their sleep patterns, mood swings, or difficulty coping with everyday activities.
~SHARING YOUR EXPERIENCES:
If you have had your own therapy, you might want to try sharing your experience of it. It could make a huge difference if you were to talk about your experience of therapy with them.
It’s similar to encouraging someone to go on holiday, especially to a place you have been before.
Describing it could ease their fears and anxiety.
You may think of ways together HOW therapy could improve your relationship with each another. You could share how your therapy has benefitted your relationship using concrete examples. You might say, “Now I tend to call if I need to cancel our night out, whereas before I just wouldn’t turn up”. If you've had positive experiences with therapy, you can share your own journey to help reduce any apprehensions. Explain how therapy has been beneficial to you and how it has helped you navigate challenging situations.
~PROVIDING INFORMATION ABOUT THERAPY:
Explain what therapy is and how it can help individuals address their concerns, improve their mental well-being, and develop coping mechanisms. Mention that therapists are professionals trained to provide guidance and support in a non-judgmental and confidential setting.
~OFFERING RESOURCES OR HELPING THEM FIND A THERAPIST:
If the person seems open to the idea, provide them with information about local therapists or mental health clinics. Offer to help them find a suitable therapist, providing recommendations or helping them navigate the process. Can you both work together to find a local or online therapist? Could you together work through organising suitable times?
You might want to see what you are able to do to assist with any of these possible burdens without completely taking over.
~OFFERING SUPPORT:
Let the person know that you're there to support them throughout the process. Reassure them that seeking therapy is a personal decision and that you'll respect their choices. Offer to accompany them to their first appointment if they feel more comfortable having someone they trust by their side.
~ADDRESSING CONCERNS OR RESERVATIONS:
Some individuals may have reservations about therapy due to stigma or misconceptions. Address their concerns and try to dispel any myths or misunderstandings they may have. Emphasize that seeking help is a sign of strength and self-care.
~GOING WITH THEM TO THE FIRST THERAPY APPOINTMENT:
You might be wondering, 'How can I support them in their therapy journey?"
Well, it doesn’t mean you have to go into the therapy room, although some therapists may welcome that on the first session.
You could simply go and sit in the waiting room or in your car outside. You might offer to drive them to the appointment and pick them up afterwards. By these small things, the person might feel you’re truly supporting them.
~CHECKING IN AFTER THE FIRST APPOINTMENT:
You may want to consider having little chats about how the therapy is going. It’s not about pushing them to talk but more about letting them know you’re there if they want to go over anything. It’s not that they have to tell you everything about the therapy but maybe they will appreciate the invitation to share some of their themes.
~REMEMBERING TO FOLLOW-UP:
After the initial conversation, check in with the person periodically to see how they're doing. Offer ongoing support and remind them that therapy is a process that takes time, but it can be transformative.
Keep in mind that, although you can encourage someone to seek therapy, ultimately, the decision lies with them. Respect their autonomy and be patient with their journey. If you believe the person is in immediate danger or poses a risk to themselves or others, it's essential to involve a mental health professional or a crisis helpline immediately.
If your friend/partner/child/sibling/work colleague... is considering therapy, you may want to consider emailing progressiveprocess@live.com.au or click here for more details.